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Love Story 2009
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Love can be so overpowering that it causes you to do the boldest, most absurd things in the world.
It can sometimes get a hold of you in the strangest places!
In the case of an Ohio man, the "love bug" bit him in the midst of doing his "job." That job, though, happened to be performing a law-breaking activity. You see, the 20-year-old eyeglass-wearing romantic got an arrow in the heart from Cupid when he and some fellow ruffians broke into a Columbus home. They robbed the place and probably terrified the owners of the house.
However, there must have apparently been something rather fetching about the lady of the house, something that made this thieving scumbag say to himself, "Yeah, man, this chick is definitely somebody I want to hook up with!"
So, 2 hours after committing this cowardly crime, the young Romeo returned to the same house.
Why?
To ask his female victim to go out on a date with him, that's why, silly!
Evidently, he either thought she wouldn't recognize him as one of the robbers or, perhaps, believed that she had been equally smitten by his charms.
Alas, though, the course of true love did not run smoothly, for the fair maiden did not share his feelings of attraction and called the proper authorities. Her suitor was promptly arrested for aggravated robbery.
Oh, well, maybe he can find his soulmate by joining one of those penpal clubs in prison. |
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Lowcostholidays Vouchers & Lowcostholidays Codes
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Yootravel.co.uk- UK's leading voucher codes website. Use lowcostholidays vouchers, lowcostholidays codes, lowcostholidays voucher codes. You can find lowcostholidays vouchers & lowcostholidays discount codes, promotional code, free voucher, discounts and many more.
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Lowcostholidays Vouchers & Lowcostholidays Codes
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Yootravel.co.uk- UK's leading voucher codes website. Use lowcostholidays vouchers, lowcostholidays codes, lowcostholidays voucher codes. You can find lowcostholidays vouchers & lowcostholidays discount codes, promotional code, free voucher, discounts and many more.
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Miss or Mister?
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Being able to complete a 800m race and win a gold medal for outdistancing her competitors by 2.45 seconds ought to make any world-class track and field star feel mighty good.
Of course there might put a little bit of a damper on things if, instead of celebrating your triumph, the world started questioning it.
This is what happened to 18-year-old South African runner Caster Semenya when she competed recently in Berlin during the world championships. It seems that there is some doubts as to...er...exactly what Caster is.
Apparently, she is not quite "girly" enough in her appearance and manner, with a low voice, male-like pecs and muscular build, so much so that she was forced to take a battery of tests from gynecologists, internal medicine specialists and a bunch of other medical experts to prove what her gender is.
I always thought that there was one surefire way to make this determination, but,
according to some circles, it's a "lot more complicated" than that.
Huh?
Although her family members swear out that Caster is female, IAAF people are not fully convinced, hence, these examinations.
No matter what the results turn out to be, it can't be good for Caster's self-esteem. If she turns out to be defined as a male, she loses her medals and gets banned from the sport. If she's determined to be female, doesn't it essentially mean that she was judged because she wasn't "hot" looking enough? |
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Oh, The Indignity!
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Apparently, Phil Spector has not quite gotten a reality check. The well-known music producer, who is serving life in prison for murdering a Hollywood actress, is supremely miffed about his current unglamorous "accommodations" at the California Substance Abuse Treatment Facility and State Prison at Corcoran
According to some sources close to him, Spector seems to believe that a man of his stature should have been sent to a better class of prison, instead of being forced to be among those in a lower social class than himself. As a matter of fact, he'd prefer to stay alone in his cell than be around his fellow inmates, whom he considers to be "lowlifes."
He also wasn't too pleased with the fact that his beautiful blonde spouse can't wear flimsy-looking outfits on her visits to him. Poor dear, having to stay at that nasty old facility while she goes home by herself to that huge, opulent mansion!
Is life unfair or what?
Evidently, somewhere in the Land of Imagination Phil Spector's mind obviously lives in now, he may actually believe that there are prisons somewhere where the inmates have personal chefs, masseuses and valet service.
Time to wake up from the illusion.
And...uh...Phil...
Acting snooty around guys who could easily crush you with their bare hands for ticking them off...
NOT A SMART THING TO DO! |
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Just Not His Day!
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Ever watch those movies where the criminals are always enterprising, cagey and clever individuals who brilliantly carry out their actions and make the cops look stupid?
Well, in real life, crooks are usually nowhere in the vicinity of that kind of intellect and some of them, in fact, are just south of "Stupidville."
Let me give a sold case in point to back up these thoughts.
Recently, an 18-year-old Wisconsin teenage thug-wannabee allegedly decided he wanted to get some cash via a robbery. His target was to be a local bar and grill in the Janesville area. The young thief even got in standard criminal garb, wearing a bandana, so he couldn't be identified by those he planned to rob and terrorize. He went in the place, probably confident that his "surprise" crime would be a piece of cake to pull off.
When the junior toughie walked into the joint, with his hands close to his pocket, (although he really didn't have a gun in there), it was a big surprise...
FOR HIM!
Why? It seems that the poorly informed dude wasn't aware that the place was full of cops who were in town, due to a golf tournament. Needless to say, there were plenty of folks around to wrestle the clueless cluck to the ground.
Though as of this writing, the wisdom-challenged youth hasn't yet been charged with an attempt to rob the drinking establishment in question, he did get arrested for disorderly conduct.
So much for "smart" criminals! |
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Knock, Knock! Who's There?
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Getting to sleep is hard enough, so imagine how ticked off you'd be if some weird guys you didn't know disturbed your slumber in the early a.m. by pounding on your back door.
It seems some insistent gents demanded, not-so-nicely, that a Missouri couple open up, so they could possibly take them into custody. Apparently, the enthusiastic fellas, who turned out to be some bounty hunters from Mississippi, believed the groggy pair were harboring some lawless individual on the lam.
Despite the sleepy husband and wife telling these dudes that they had the wrong people, the aggressive Neanderthals refused to listen and even threatened to kick in the door. A gun was even supposedly drawn, but, thankfully, no shots were fired.
When the bounty hunters continued to stand their ground, the helpless couple inside the house's only choice was to call the cops. Though the stubborn guys outside the home insisted they had the right to do what they did, it was discovered that not only did they not have a license to go after anybody in the state of Missouri, but the dumb duo had the wrong name of the so-called "fugitive" they were after.
Instead of the poor, innocent and now fully awake couple being courted off , the clueless bounty hunters were the ones taken away. Ironically, they might be up for felony charges themselves.
Now, let's see who'll be losing some sleep! |
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Bittersweet Revenge
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"Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned," goes the old saying. Well, imagine the problems you'd go through if you had four scorned women on your hands.
That's the situation one Wisconsin gent found himself in, according to recent news headlines.
When the dude's wife concluded that her spouse had been cheating on her, she called the strange telephone numbers left on his cell phone, which turned out to be those of 3 other women he had been seeing on the side. She called to inform them that the man they believed to be their "true love" was married with kids.
All the women in question were- shall we say?- definitely not happy campers.
Miffed at being hoodwinked, the women decided to unite and come up with their own unique brand of vengeance against the scalawag.
When the cheating dawg was told to meet one his mistresses at a motel, he anxiously complied, happy to agree to her wishes to tie him up and blindfold him for a little kinky "fun." While the clueless jerk waited for the festivities to begin, he was instead confronted by his wife and all three mistresses.
According to him, the ladies taunted him and physically assaulted him, even going so far as to use some Krazy Glue to glue his---er---you-know-what to his stomach, before leaving him alone in the motel room.
He managed to escape and informed the cops of the event. The women were promptly arrested for their actions.
So, basically, even though they got back at him with what they did, the guy still ends up the big winner, 'cause while they may end up doing some jail time, he'll still be free to keep on with his cheating ways. |
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Tweet With Caution!
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Those of us who live in apartments know that it can sometimes be a hellish experience, particularly if you live in a place that suffers from cockroach infestations, thin walls, poor plumbing, loud neighbors, criminal activity and a host of other yucky inconveniences.
You may feel like going somewhere and shouting to the whole world about how miserable your present living conditions are and what jerks your apartment managers are. Since Twitter is the latest and hottest means of expressing yourself to as many people as possible, you may even get the urge to criticize your apartment complex on the internet. After all, you do have a right to free speech, right?
Uh...well... maybe not.
You may just want to think twice before tweeting your complaints to the known universe. A Chicago lady recently discovered this too late, after utilizing Twitter to accuse her landlord of having moldy apartments.
The landlord was not amused and accused the woman of being libelous, after which he filed a lawsuit that may end up putting her out of $50,000.
Frankly, it would have been a lot cheaper and less troublesome for her to just leave her apartment and find another place to reside.
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Scandal Hits New Jersey...Again!
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If you can't trust your rabbi, who can you trust?
That might be the very question many of New Jersey's residents are asking themselves now, following the recent stunning revelation that a bunch of supposedly "respectable" people were part of a huge bust for corruption.
Both religious and political officials in the state were busted for appalling acts, like accepting bribes, selling human organs to black market customers and money laundering. Among the crowd of deviants were individuals elected to public office, like assemblymen, mayors and the like. The most shocking discovery, though, was the inclusion of five Orthodox rabbis in the group of sordid criminals.
Apparently, there had been a covert investigation by the feds to get proof that these people were involved in these shenanigans and manipulating others, due to their high standing.
Evidently, these folks believed that they could continue in their wrongdoing and arrogantly thought nobody would catch on or tell. Unfortunately for them, one of their "associates" squealed (doesn't this always happen?), which led to the investigation that uncovered their sleazy deeds. Sadly, the rabbis will probably be leading prayers in the "Big House" for the next 5 to 10 years.
As if this state's image wasn't already tarnished enough by Real Housewives of New Jersey! |
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Super Scumbags!
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Sometimes you think nothing you hear in today's jaded, self-absorbed world will really surprise you. Occasionally, though, a story comes along that just makes your jaw drop to the floor in disbelief.
One such story happened recently in Lebanon, Ohio, an all-American town where you'd expect people to be pretty decent. That notion was debunked, however, when thieves broke into an area couple's home.
While, certainly, a home robbery is nothing out of the ordinary, what made this deplorable act even worse is that the couple whose home was broken into had just lost their 2-year-old little boy. The grieving parents left their house, in order to go to the funeral home to plan their deceased toddler's funeral. This, evidently, was just what the crooks in question were waiting for and they took advantage of the "opportunity" to break in the back of the house and steal items, including jewelry and an antique firearm.
Authorities are convinced that the robbers in question were fully aware of the couple's situation, which is why they timed their burglary the way they did.
Everybody knows times are hard, economically, but have people sunk so low that they would do something so appallingly coldhearted?
These parents already had to face burying their kid, which was horrifying enough, but to add more grief by robbing their home at their most vulnerable point really takes a bunch of SCUMBAGS.
As of this writing, the robbers have not been caught, but I hope, when they are captured, they put them under the jail. |
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Attack of the Cranky Cook
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There are 3 things in life you should never do:
Never sit on a stove top without checking to see if it's on first.
Never reach down to pet a pit bull on the head, just because his tail is wagging.
AND...
Never insult an old woman's cooking, not unless you want one heck of a fight on your hands.
The latter thing is what one 71-year-old dude failed to remember and it cost him considerable peace of mind.
The discriminating feller decided to criticize his 66-year-old common-law wife's culinary skills, after being served what he deemed to be less than satisfactory fare, Evidently, what he deemed to be "overly done" bread and barely cooked potatoes did not suit his fancy and he let her know this, in no uncertain terms.
Understandably, her reaction was less than positive and the elderly pair got into an increasingly heated spat. The enraged old gal followed him into their bedroom and further demonstrated her displeasure by hurling a telephone at his person..
The authorities were eventually called to the scene, which resulted in the spunky elderly female being arrested for battering an elderly person.
Turns out, though, that there was a perfectly good explanation for her failed cooking attempt.
She was drunk as a skunk at the time. |
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Teachers Gives Students "Unforgettable" Gift
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Some 5th grade students in Elk Grove, California got an end-of-the-year gift from their teacher that was more than they or their parents were expecting.
The "thoughtful" instructor decided to give them a sentimental DVD that had video montages of all of their activities throughout the year. Sweet idea, except it wasn't just their activities that were on the DVD, but some of her own. Apparently, it also contained a scene of the teacher in a...er... very, very "intimate" situation on her divan. The incident had been mistakenly included.
Imagine the stunned students' shock at seeing the schoolmarm in a way too private moment and imagine the explanations their parents must now be scrambling for to answer the curious questions that are bound to come up.
The red-faced teacher is, naturally, horrified about her tacky fau paux, but, despite parents' outrage, she won't be thrown into the slammer and chances are she will be able to keep her position.
Hopefully, her young charges will be able to put the images they saw out of their minds and go on to a normal life.
My suggestion is that, in the future, this frisky educator should restrict her end-of-the-year classroom activities to a parent-supervised class party and yearbook signings. |
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Don't Cry for Me, Argentina
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When South Carolina's Governor Mark Sanford disappeared for nearly a week, staff members hastily explained his absence by claiming that the overworked politician was taking a "hiking" excursion on the Appalachian Trail.
Well, unless there has been a huge global warming trend that has caused the Appalachian Trail to drop down into Argentina, it seems that the governor misled his staff members, as well as the citizens of his state.
After being spotted at the Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport in Atlanta, after getting off a plane from Argentina, Sanford held a news conference when he arrived back in SC. He then confessed that he had spent the five missing days with a "dear, dear friend" down Argentine way- yep, a female!- and that he had, in fact, been having an affair with the mystery woman for over a year, meeting her a total of 3 times.
His wife Jenny was not present at the news conference to "stand by her man", having tossed his rear out of their home a few weeks earlier, evidently aware of her hubby's shenanigans.
Now, some of Sanford's constituents and fellow GOP members want to toss him out as governor, as well.
Given the fact that, while a congressman, Sanford criticized then President Bill Clinton's moral improprieties and voted for his impeachment, it seems only fair that he, himself, should be judged by the same criteria. |
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