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Category:News
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Maybe It's the Heat!
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If you thought you had the neighbors from hell, then perhaps you might look a little more kindly towards them after hearing this news story.
When you usually think of South Carolina, you think of tranquil, picturesque beaches, friendly people and a quiet lifestyle. Alas, another regional myth dispelled!
A 23-year-old Isle of Palms, South Carolina woman proved to be less than the stereotypical Southern belle recently when she committed an act that ended up getting her arrested.
Apparently, the 50th Avenue resident was none too pleased with her neighbors.
It seems that they refused to allow her to take a swim in their pool, which evidently ticked her off.
The little lady displayed her dissatisfaction by breaking into those same neighbors' house and trashing the inside of their home. Her actions included throwing stuff around and wiping her blood on walls, furniture, doors, bedding and more. The diminutive psychopath left the place a mess.
She was later arrested by the cops and charged with two counts of first-degree burglary, when they matched her DNA with the blood from the scene of the crime.
Wonder how she'll take it when she finds out that there's no swimming pools in prison? |
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Curb Your Enthusiasm
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Certainly, we all appreciate the importance of law enforcement officers, who help to keep our society safe, or at least try to. Their duty is to get hardened, dangerous criminals off the streets, so we have always been told, but it seems that their obligations in our modern society sometimes get a bit sketchy.
Take what happened recently in the tiny little burg of Rock Hill, South Carolina. During a graduation ceremony that took place at Fort Mill High School, it seems that a few people got somewhat enthusiastic, which is not unusual, when you consider that they probably had a kid, relative or friend about to receive his diploma. The problem is that they demonstrated their excitement by cheering whenever the names of the students were called out, violating the edict by school officials to behave with dignity.
So, was this rowdy group of seven rounded up and asked to leave the premises?
Nope, they were arrested by the cops for "disrupting" the ceremony and charged with "disorderly conduct."
Granted, these folks may have deserved to be ousted, for being loud and tacky, bur shouldn't local taxes be better spent on arresting individuals who do stuff like...oh, I dunno...killing people??? |
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What a Way to Go!
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There comes a time when all men's lives must come to an end and they must "shake off this mortal coil." Recently, 89-year-old Ohioan Fredric J. Baur, breathed his last on this sphere we call Earth.
Ah, but this was no ordinary Cincinnati resident!
You see, those who of us who enjoy an occasional snack may owe the late Mr. Baur a tremendous debt, because it was he who came up with the design for the Pringles potato crisps' canister. The gifted chemist used his knowledge and creativity as a food storage technician to come up the tube containing those thin, curvy, edible treats millions worldwide have come to love and pig out on.
Naturally, one would expect a man of such remarkable merits to be adequately honored for such an incredible contribution.
"But how?," you may be asking yourself.
Apparently, Mr. Baur had his own unique ideas on this, which he passed along to his children. His desire, apparently, was to be cremated, after his demise, and for part of his ashes to be placed in a Pringles can and buried.
Family members did not disclose whether the canister containing Baur was for regular flavored or Ranch flavored Pringles. |
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Say It Ain't So, Ed!
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Those of us who fall into the ranks of the "average" struggle to survive in today's economy. How often do we envy the rich and privileged, who have no worries, because they've still got the money to afford their lavish lifestyles?
Well, maybe not all of them.
A recent story revealed that Ed McMahon, former guffawing sidekick on the classic "The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson" may be about to have his fancy mansion foreclosed on, because he is behind on his monthly payments.
$644,000 to be exact.
So, how does a television personality and longtime product pitchman, who has been earning showbiz bucks for years, end up in the same boat with folks who make far less?
Unfortunately, the 85-year-old McMahon, has been incapacitated, due to a serious physical injury several months ago, meaning that he had to stop working, which means that no more income was coming in, which means that he couldn't pay his mortgage.
Wow, he sounds almost like ...the rest of us!
Guess he needs the Publisher's Clearinghouse people to knock on his, door, too!
(Okay, for those too young to get this, Ed McMahon use to be the spokesman for PCH. See the sad irony?)
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Really Cleaning Up
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As always, Florida remains an interesting state for finding bizarre news items.
Once again, they have not disappointed.
A Tampa, Florida man decided to seek out the internet to find a maid, while his spouse was on vacation. Forget about looking in his local telephone book to find a trustworthy service with screened employees. Apparently, this fellow thought he could find the cleaning candidate of his choice online, especially since she offered just a little "something extra" than your standard maid service.
The woman he decided to hire showed up, as scheduled, and charged $100 per hour rate. So, what skills, you may wonder, made her worthy of such an exorbitant fee?
It appears that her first order of business was to remove her outfit and perform her duties in the raw, hence, the reason she was hired from the internet. She also managed to keep her blissfully ignorant, temporary "employer" from discovering that she was robbing him of $40,000 worth of jewels.
The "gentleman" who employed her claimed to deputies that he merely left her in the boudoir alone to complete her tasks, obviously believing that the Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office is comprised of people born yesterday.
Would love to know what his explanation to his wife was!
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Proms Can Be Dangerous!
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It used to be that, when a girl got passed over as a potential prom date, she stayed locked, weeping torrents of tears, in her bedroom or called her friends to discuss the shortcomings of the male species or took out her angst by pigging out on a carton of Hagan-Daz Rocky Road ice cream.
That was then, this is now.
Apparently, some of today's slew of rejected prom dates may be a bit more demonstrative. At least, this was the case of one spurned Trenton, New Jersey teen. the 19-year-old gal decided that payback was in order, when the boy of her dreams refused to ask her to be his prom "date mate."
Police allege that the disgruntled lass burned down the house of the fella that broke her heart. His folks and other family members barely managed to get out alive
What really appears to have sent the incensed chick over the edge was the further revelation that the dude who rejected her had, instead, chosen to take another girl to the event.
Hm, wonder why?
I suppose this is sort of a high school version of "Fatal Attraction!"
The teen torcher was arrested and charged with arson. |
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One Whacked Granny
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If you still have a nostalgic perception of grandmas being sweet, cookie-baking little ladies, one recent news story will quickly dispel that somewhat idealistic image.
It seems that there are always odd goings-on in the state of Michigan and, once more, another jaw-dropping incident has occurred. A 43-year old Canton Township granny was left to look after her darling 19-month old grandchild.
So, did she read the little tot fairy tales or tuck him in, with a plush, adorable little teddy bear at his side or sit him with him in front of the television, as a Disney cartoon video played?
Well, not exactly.
It seems that this particular grandmother used her babysitting time to take her precious grandchild along on a heist. Ms. R. S. Lunsford decided to have the wee babe accompany her, as she broke into a neighboring condo, to filch somebody else's possessions. Apparently, Grandma didn't seem to realize that pushing a baby stroller along to a theft doesn't exactly make you invisible and. so. the cops were alerted in time to put the handcuffs on and arrest Lunsford for home invasion.
Granny Lunsford- an ex-con, by the way- also had some illegal drugs on her.
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But, it's an Emergency!
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What exactly is considered to be an "emergency situation" in Port Walton Beach, Michigan? Evidently, one of the town's citizens had his own ideas of what the answer to that question is.
A 48-year-old man, with, apparently, lots of vacant time on his hands and, probably, a few slices short of a loaf, decided to call 911 on three different occasions, recently.
Why?
The first time around, the putz called to report that somebody was knocking at his door. The idea that he should simply go to the door and ask, "Who is it?" never dawned on him. The second time, the absurd gent called the Port Walton Beach 911 dispatchers and decided to lend a little more excitement to his story by claiming that he had knowledge of where somebody was selling narcotics.
So, was his third time calling due to a dangerous situation, like, say, an assault or gun-firing intruder?
Nope!
His final reason for calling the emergency 'phone number seems to be that he had some pressing questions about the moon he wanted answered.
Each time, a deputy from the area sheriff's department was assigned the thankless task of going to check out the nutty fella's claims.
The moon question thing seems to have been the straw that broke the camel's back and the 48-year-old caller was arrested on a misdemeanor charge.
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Welcome to the 19th Century
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It is difficult to fathom how, in the age of technology, there are actually people, in so-called "western" nations, who are still clueless, in terms of being cyber savvy.
A recent CNET poll, however, revealed that there are a disturbing number of Americans who are deficient in internet skills.
21% of U.S. households have never sent an email nor browsed or looked up information on the web, nor have they even visited any websites. Unbelievably, 18% of American households don't even use the internet Considering that the United States is hailed as the leader of the western world, it is amazing that so many of its citizens are so far behind in basic technology skills.
The problem seems to be largely related to how old individuals are, what their level of education is and what their socio-economic level is. You could excuse it all by saying that the internet may be unaffordable for the less privileged or too hard to learn for the elderly, but you can go to most libraries in the U.S.A. and access the internet for free and there are community centers 'round the nation that offer no or low cost computer classes for seniors.
I guess they don't know about how to use the internet, 'cause, basically, they don't really want to.
Respondents to the CNET survey were asked questions related to this topic over the telephone- which, thank God, they did know how to use. |
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Future Millionaire?
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If this is any indication of the things to come, it looks like there may be a bright future ahead for one particularly industrious Girl Scout.
While we are all familiar with the annual cookie-selling tradition of the Girl Scout organization, we don't customarily hear or really care about specific figures, in terms of how much they sold. We are pretty much only focused on how many of these things we can stuff ourselves silly with, before going into a shame spiral for
being so piggy.
There are some things too extraordinary to forget, though. A 15-year-old GS from Dearborn, Michigan recently distinguished herself by selling... are you ready for this?...17, 328 boxes of the sinfully delicious treats this year. Her efforts helped her troop raise a fat $21,000 in cookie profits.
The mini fund-raiser sold the cookies from a street corner stand to interested passers-by, despite their sugary content and diet-sabotaging calories,
All I can is this kid must have charm by the buckets!
The 15-year-old GS and her fellow troop members will be rewarded by going on a trip to Europe.
Perhaps Donald Trump ought to have a kiddie edition of "The Apprentice" and invite savvy young people like this girl on. |
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Some Wishes Really Do Come True!
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Even though some of us have long since passed that time when we went through the hellish drudgery that was known as "public education", we can still remember wishing that we had fewer days to have to attend school.
Well, even though our own hopes were sadly dashed, it seems that the students in the MacCray School District in Minnesota may have their similar dreams finally come to pass. According to reports, the district's superintendent has declared that, starting in the fall of 2008, there will only be four days of school attendance each week.
Supposedly, the purpose for this move is to cut back on transportation costs, likely up because of the increase in gas prices.
That means 23 fewer days of school next year to endure. Not surprisingly, the kids are celebrating this news, enthusiastically.
Of course, there is a downside, depending on how you look at it. When students DO come to school, there will be an additional hour tacked on to the day, but, somehow, I don't think they'll mind that little inconvenience one bit, knowing that they get a sweet 3-day weekend, as a result.
How come nobody came up with this stuff until AFTER I graduated? |
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Calorie-Counting Cops?
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Who of us hasn't walked into a convenience store, only to see one of our "heroes in blue" standing in line with doughnuts and styrofoam cups of hot coffee? This is a long-standing image in the public psyche, but according to the Los Angeles Police Department, it isn't particularly an image they want their officers connected with.
It seems that the "diet cops" have struck the LAPD. Now those burly fellows with protruding bellies, squishy love handles and cute, jiggly jowls are being told by a dietician that it's time to get rid of the flab. They are being cautioned to switch to a healthier diet that will make them look and feel a lot better, plus possibly diminish the risk of them dropping dead from a coronary, when they have to run down a suspect on L.A.'s mean streets.
While some of the City of Angels' finest are not happy with being asked to make changes, others are actually giving it a try.
So, while you might still see cops standing in line at the 7-Eleven, next time they might be buying unsweetened apple juice and an energy bar, instead of a honey bun and sugar-saturated java. |
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Abracadara...You're Fired!
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What would you say the greatest threat to our schools is?
Violence? Teachers who sexually assault students? Low graduation rates?
Nope.
Apparently, the Pasco County , Florida school system seems to think that substitute teachers performing amateur magic tricks are destructive to our youth.
When a well-intentioned sub recently entertained middle school students by making a toothpick disappear and reappear, he was charged with "wizardry" by the paranoid school district.
We're not talking here about a guy who came into the classroom, dressed up like a Druid, waving a wand and demanding that the kids pledge their undying loyalty to Satan, but somebody who simply did a sight gag any 6-year-old could learn.
To say that this was a case of "overreacting" is an understatement.
The principal of the school, where the substitute taught, dismissed him and it looks as though his job prospects are kaput.
Quizzed by the media about this, Pasco County's assistant superintendent claimed that other issues, besides just the "wizardry" thing, were matters of concern, regarding the substitute teacher.
The poor fellow is understandably perplexed, but this seems to be another school system being overly paranoid, due to the bad press schools have gotten for legitimate problems.
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Talk Nice to Your Potty...Or Else
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Next time you get an overwhelming urge to verbally assault your overflowing toilet, you may want to hold back- that is, if the toilet in question is in the city of Scranton, Pennsylvania.
You see, it may get you in serious trouble in this "Keystone State" city.
A Scranton woman recently found this out when she was cited by authorities, after being overheard using a few choice expletives when her commode overflowed.
She was charged with "disorderly conduct" and could get a $300 fine and 90 days in the clinker.
Cops were called in when one of their own, who happened to be the lady's neighbor, objected to having to listen to her obscenities, which he overheard , due to her open bathroom window.
It's amazing that the cops actually charged this woman with anything, considering the special circumstances.
Did it ever occur to this neighbor to just close his window or go to another part of his home, where he wouldn't be able to hear?
What's next...the death penalty for cursing, when you mistakenly hit your thumb with a hammer?
Evidently, there aren't enough murders, sexual assaults and drunk driving incidents to keep the Scranton police department adequately occupied. |
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